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Run up a wall.
Well, it's been your lifelong dream and finally you can realize it. You take a long run up and head straight for the nearest wall, placing all your trust in the non-laws of non-physics that exist in this strange world. Unfortunately these physics are completely unpredictable, so you merely smash headlong into the wall.
However, in a truly Andy-like turn of events you discover the wall you chose was a false one hiding a treasure chest. You kick it until it unlatches and reach into its shining interior. You got the Dungeon Map! Excellent work!
Looking at it makes you very queazy.