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Scratch your back
While you're scratching your back you notice a little purple speck on your fingernail. You put it under the Scanning Tunneling Microscope in your basement and discover it to be a new, never-before-seen virus. You show it to the Doctor and he informs you that you only have two days to live.
Luckily you realize in your sleep that the cure is inside Tim. After a biopsy that went sour and ended up being an autopsy you get the cure and win the nobel prize for being a smartass.
Unfortunately the virus is never seen again so you never collect on the royalties.
GAME OVER